Wednesday, January 18, 2012

White trash confession #731

WARNING:contains salty(ish) language

Don't tell anybody but-I swear. I know. Shocker. You had no idea. Yes, I know cursing is the exclusive domain of the lazy. I do believe we've covered my gargantuan lazy streak. In fact, I swear kind of a lot. Even around my kids. Well, even at my kids. The truth is, curse words and really inappropriate words of any kind amuse me. And, since I have decided to die having never been too serious another day in my life, this works for me. Now, I try to keep it fairly clean around kids that belong to other people. I admit to being white trash but haven't managed to sink that low yet. I do STILL wear a bra to Walmart thank you very much. I also try to control myself around the lily white members of the Friends and Fam that can't handle somebody saying shut-up without having a fit of the vapors. Which brings me to the point of this unsolicited confession(always the best kind!). I was talking to my sister last Saturday and referred to the children as being "little bastards anyway". A phrase I use often. A phrase on occasion I believe to be true. I was overheard. And the rest is history I suppose. Ask any of my kids and they'll tell you they believe in their legitimacy and are okay with it and the fact that I'm a crappy mother. Which is why if you start getting cards from us signed The Bitch, the Jackass and the little bastards you should just smile and be cool. We are.        

1 comment:

Petersons said...

Yes... Dumbass, stupid ass, retard, handi, & shitballs are regular words in my vocabulary. Daily. Oh, and "Boobies!" cuz I love saying it and punching my kids' chests. I also refer to them as The Children of the Corn. I've tried to get them to watch it and Avery looks scared shitless when I tell her we're gonna watch it! Priceless.