Through the fog.

Yesterday I took a mental health day. I knew I had no chance of improving my mental health so, I took a day. Har. It's so cool when I say something dumb like that and it is indistinguishable from something my Dad would say. I love being Marv. I should have saved it for today. No, not the joke(loosely defined of course). The mental health day. Suzie was up all night tossing her cookies and everything else she even considered eating in the last year. I'm pretty sure she puked things she was supposed to eat next Tuesday. You know that means I was up all night too.  I tried to sleep when she did today but she hasn't managed more than maybe an hour and a half at a stretch. But, thanks to my lack of ambition yesterday I'm sitting at the computer-squinting through one eye and the screeching headache that has been pinging around in my head all day, trying not to fail spectacularly(again)this year. Truth is, I'm not used to this crap anymore. When I have a really bad night and end up this tired, it just means that I don't accomplish that much and the kids are in charge of their own dinner. The kids are just old enough that I rarely have to take care of someone when I'm this foggy. And boy am I foggy. For example, this morning I got some almonds out for a snack and lost them before I could eat them. I just found them on Tim's side of the bed-under the covers no less. I have been eating crackers all day because that is the only thing that seems reasonable, effort wise, when I wander into the kitchen. I went to Smith's to get some Gatorade etc... for Suz and got kinda lost. Not lost exactly but I had been up and down the Valentine isle and was in the corner looking at eggs and milk before I realized I was supposed to be over by the pharmacy getting pain meds. I stood staring into space in front of the cold drinks by produce so long some guy came up to me and asked if I needed help. I'm sure it was obvious to everyone there that I did indeed need the kind of help you don't find in the grocery store. I also stopped in front of the wrong line at the stop light and had to back up while the lady behind me shook her head at me. This was par for the course when the kids were little but not anymore. It's one of the little things that no Mother can warn you about before you have kids. Like parenthood itself, it's one of the things you have to experience to really get. I don't think I've missed it one bit. I'm going now. Did I mention I was tired? I can't remember.