Sunday, June 24, 2012


Outside of the obvious first class ticket to Hell that has my name all over it, there are a few more reasons why it's good I don't go to church all that often. One of them is that I might actually feel the need to think anything but horrible thoughts about the girl that hit the boys with her car last December. Or, possibly try to forgive her instead of laying in bed wishing that leprosy was more prevalent in America.

As I sit here, shaking with frustration after shooting off yet another email to her insurance company, it's pretty easy to keep Jiminy Cricket locked in his little cage. Yes, I said last December. Every 4-6 weeks it's another round of bills they haven't properly paid landing at my doorstep. Then it's a round of phone tag with the odious woman that handles the medical claims at Mutual of Enumclaw, the awful insurance company that this particular floozy had when she decided her phone was more important than looking at where she was driving her car. It's the way they have handled this situation that makes me start to look at accident lawyers differently. I REALLY don't want the particular set of complications a lawyer brings but it's almost like insurance companies want to push people into hiring one out of self preservation. Let me tell you, the temptation gets greater by the day.

Emily had the misfortune to come over on a day when I was particularly fed up with this mess. She had the idea to look the cheap hussy up on Facebook. I told her not to bother. We wouldn't be able to look at anything even if we did find her. Boy was I wrong. There she was in all her splendor. Not even smart enough to not have every single thing on her profile completely open to the viewing public. We went all the way back to the week of the accident and...nothing except pictures of her super new haircut!! and she's now engaged!!!. I don't know what I was expecting but it would have helped if she had put up a status update to the effect of, "I am a shallow brainless idiot that just hit 2 boys in a crosswalk because I totally suck and actually feel bad about it". Maybe this and the fact that Thomas is still struggling with the damage he sustained on his right side, means I sit here with fantasies (among others) involving disfiguring skin conditions and major natural disasters popping up on her wedding day and/or having her get hit in a cross walk by an uninsured motorist. I want her to have at least double the misery we have had to endure the last 6 months. In all honesty, at this point in the game she could be the Mother Teresa of northern Utah and I will still want to punch all her teeth out and feed them to her for what she carelessly did to my babies.  

I know I know. Bitterness and hatred corrodes the soul, Karma can be a bitch and all that rot. I soooo don't care anymore. I'm willing to be a bitter, evil old crone in Hell if I get to take this chick and all of the blood suckers at Mutual of Enumclaw with me. 

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