Uh.

I sat down at the computer next to the new package of gumballs I left for the little tykes- determined to hammer this thing out and not miss another day. And here I still sit; a couple of hours later, no further than the painfully clever title at the top of this post. However, I have somehow managed to get my ass handed to me by my sister in a game of Words with Friends then start 2 more, read through my Facebook feed, clear my e-mail, polish off 2 cups of coffee, give Pinterest a quick gander and scroll through umpteen blogs on Blogger-all while listening to Willie Nelson, Foster The People and Motley Crue in a continual loop with an enormous jaw ache from chewing something like 10 gumballs all at once. From this sad little interlude I have concluded that:

1. I suck.

2. I should never sit in close proximity to any amount of tasty gum type products while distracted or really ever.

3. I am a lazy Scrabble, er- I mean Words With Friends player with a sad lack of a competitive streak to boot.

4. I deeply resent the existence of the letter J.

5. I need to check my email more often.

6. Two cups of coffee+after 10 p.m.=heartburn.

7. If you listen to Girls, Girls, Girls too many times in a row you actually start leering at the nearest girl. Even if it's your own reflection in the computer monitor. 

8. Catching yourself leering at yourself is not only super awkward but kinda creepy.

9. I should have chosen something a little less ambitious for my resolution like "shower more" or "stop eating cigarette butts" rather than the fancy schmancy one I chose.

10. I should have stopped with the awesome title and gone to bed two hours ago.